the hammock hangout

Ah Burning Man, the hot desert festival that everyone wants to go to (but most people just say they do so they’ll sound cool, but really who cares about the latest in synthetic drug technology?  And we’ve all seen lots of naked people before, so there’s little need to go all the way down to the dry dusty inferno,  just to have a fire dance and wear goggles in the night, I can do that in my backyard any day of the week, there’s heaps of better things to do with time and money right?  Like going to Hueco for example)  but nonetheless hoards of leather-headed hippies head south, or north, and release their death grip on what they think is reality and party likes it’s 1969.  Sounds like fun.  Honestly.

Cage dancing.  I’ve done a little – remember Dave?  That time we got all fucked up at Mont Tremblant in Quebec and there were those cute girls who wanted us to cage dance with them?  Or at least that’s how I remember it.  Well, cage dancing is a big part of the festivities it Burning Man, that part sounds like fun too, but what doesn’t sound like fun is the safety harness they’ll make you wear. Read this caption from their website, and then take a close look at the last photograph.  KILLER funny.  I stumbled upon this site tonight while trying to find a picture for my upcoming slide show entitled, ” The Ultimate Extreme Vertical Epic Adventure of All Time Carnival”.  It’s going to be radical in every direction.  But nevermind that, check this out and have a good night…

“The cage will be 42 feet off the ground on top of the main center pole. To get there you will need to climb a rope ladder through the center opening of the parachutes.  It will be very ‘hairy’ to climb to the top so we will strictly limit access. Since safety comes third in the list of hundreds of things that are important at Burning Man–just after costumes, of coarse–there was some extra safety equipment that required. The first being 3/8″ steel airplane cables to replace the rope guide wires.  We will also be top-roping everyone who climbs up the rope ladder just in case. Once the climber reaches the crow’s nest he/she can clip in to a safety strap attached to the cage. That is what the second carabiner is for in the photo.”

The tent of a thousand hammocks.  The sensor of four dirty specks.

This will be your Industrial Rigor for the evening.  Don’t worry, he’s a professional.  Just look at all that rope, but whatever you do, don’t look at his ginch.

Well at least they got airplane cables and a 3/8’s – bolt/nut combination.  That should hold reeel good.

Hey wait a minute, is this set up ACMG approved?   Is that spectra I see?   Sweeet.

  • Kevin O

    At least that biner is locked, I think. Quality control at black diamond would love this picture.

  • Definitely not ACMG approved….
    I don’t understand why Ian Martin spent all his time designing a safe comfortable harness, that looks like it should work great and is safe and comfortable…

    But at risk of not sounding cool… I really want to go to burning man.

  • Marc

    Yikes, is that a Bowline! Watch out, everyone knows those can untie themselves!!! lol

  • Sonnie

    Ha, I want to see Burning Man as well, but I can’t tell if the biner is locked or not, looks like it though if I had to guess, not that it makes the cross loading okay. Smirk. And what’s with that sling going straight up the crotch like that? I hope to god it’s a bowline, I think after five seconds I’d start praying that it comes undone. ha ha!

  • Saying you want to go to Burning Man, even though you know you never will, is about as cool as misspelling “Photo’s,” “Foto’s” on your blog. Ha! Just joshing man always loved your blog and thanks for the sweet foto’s!!

  • Sonnie

    C’mon, seriusly, I meen reely hu spels foto’s with a ph these dayz? Onestly, hu has the time? Seems a bit rediculuss 2 me considering in the future we’ll all be talking in Textese anyway (also known as txtese, chatspeak, txt, textspeak, txtspk, txtk, texting language, txtng or txt talk). FYI my favorite textese of all is “AAAAA” – which of course stands for the American Association Against Acronym Abuse. ha ha ha, Glad you like the pics, more to come.